So this is one of the handful of posts I've been mulling over this week. The problem is that when I don't just write things down while they are fresh, they start seeming less and less interesting, and my writing kind of suffers from the diminished excitement I'm feeling about the idea. What is the saying - closeness breeds contempt? But this idea is good enough I'm going to give it a try anyway - although I'm sure it has been said before. I think the incredibly thoughtful comments from an earlier post of mine this week illustrate quite well the point I'm trying to make.
I was talking to my mom about how much better my life has gotten since I started blogging and connecting with all you disembodied darlings out there. (I've told my family and some of my friends that I have a blog, but not given anyone the url or told them how to find me. I figure if they're that curious, then they can live with what they read here.) And my mom pointed out that what we have here in the blogosphere is a record of women's oral history. That what we do here among IF bloggers is something women have always done - support each other, share information, ideas, experiences. Only now we have a record of that. And that record itself can serve the community - I've spent hours over the past month reading people's stories, from their first posts to their most recent, often feeling a deep connection with one woman's experience of one day that happened 2 years ago. The story of that one day, that one incident, that one conversation - can change me. I feel less alone, I better understand my own experience, I'm challenged to re-think my beliefs or expectations about this journey, about people, about myself. My sense of compassion for and solidarity with everyone facing infertility grows. I grow.
To me, this is incredibly beautiful. That we are all creating something here, something that supports and sustains us when things are difficult, something that rejoices with us when things go well. And something that serves not only those of us who are in the community, with blogs and identities and friendships already established, but also those who might just be passing through, desperate for information and connection (as I was a few weeks ago), or just curious, or even here by accident.
It's so generous, this blog stuff. It's like hobo signs - without knowing who's following behind, we're leaving something we hope will help. And we're listening to the ones who were here before us. Dang, I love it.
About Me
- annacyclopedia
- I've moved! Find me and my thoughts on donor insemination, marriage, and the banal details of my daily life at http://annacyclopediaisworkingonit.wordpress.com/.
14 comments:
Beautiful post. And so true.
Such a wonderful, thoughtful post. I love your ideas!
Oh my dear annacyclopedia, I am so glad we both found this community! I remember doing the same thing - reading people's blogs from the beginning, getting so invested in all these things that had happened a year or two in the past. (I still do it, but I'm running out of blogs...have I found the end of the internets? Gasp!)I felt like I KNEW these people. (But then I felt creepy starting to comment on their blogs because um, they didn't know me.)
Now that I am blogging and not just being creepy I am so happy to have found this community. I seriously don't know what I would have done without you guys.
Enough about mememe. This post is awesome. I love the idea that we're basically taking the tradition of oral history and making it written. (Now with added comments!)
And the hobo sign are cool as heck. I didn't know about those. We're marking the way!
Yay. I feel warm and fuzzy now.
yes yes YES!
I also started my own blog so i wouldn't be that creepy commenter.
Isn't it a great use of technology, that we all get to find each other around the world and share our experiences?
Thanks everybody! I feel even warmer and fuzzier than I did when I was writing this post.
I agree with you, this is an extraordinary communication medium...
That's a terrific analogy!
Where's my train?
I love having this community and I can't imagine how I would have EVER survived the past year and half without it.
I really like this post.
Hi - just stumbled across your blog....I love this post! One of my favorite quotes is:
"When we set out on a woman's journey, we are often swimming a high and unruly sea, and we seem to know that the important thing is to swim together - to send out vibrations, our stories, so that no one gets lost." - Sue Monk Kidd
She uses the analogy of women sending out signals to one another to help each other through their journeys - like whales do for one another in the ocean.
I came to your blog after following the links from Mel's post on the 'Letter to my body' project (have just written mine, and found the process incredibly therapeutic).
I just wanted to say how much I've enjoyed reading your insights - I loved your suggestion that we are in the process of creating a new form of shared history here in the blogosphere.
I think, too, that this is a historical first. Never before in history, as far as I know, have women written so much and so openly about their experiences. I love the fact that there are so many different women here, people I never would have met in real life, and that their words may survive into posterity. Finally, we're visible (or at least audible or legible).
I love it! So eloquently put too.
hehe. Shinejil said "legible."
If this blog stuff were written by hand it wouldn't be. My penmanship is awful and I'd have tear and chocolate stains all over the paper.
I love this post too.
My last visit to the clinic counselor lead to a conversation about how (warning stereotypes that may or not apply to your relationship but does fit mine) women tend to need to talk and talk and men... well are different. My man is an engineer. He designs amazing things using CAD softwares and equations and his understanding of material science. I teach kids to talk. Yeah.. the stereotype fits.
What I love about the blogs is that it isn't that we need to talk, but that we need to be heard. My journal was only so helpful, but knowing that someone else was hearing me on my blog (and perhaps even dropping a comment here or there if it made sense to do so) is this wonderful release for me.
It is like an oral tradition, but one where I can go on and on if I wish without worry of taking too much floor time from others. There is much less worry about delicately handling your listener's emotional needs (as compared to face-to-face communicaiton). And I can quickly go back and read old posts and see how time and distance do change things (my journal is too much a pile of chicken scrach where I can read more into the emotional state I was in than I can decipher the actual words)
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